it's late...

....or should I really be saying, "Wow, it's early."? I have no idea why I'm starting a new post at 1:08a.m. when I should be sleeping. To be honest 1a.m. isn't usually that early, but this week it seems like 5a.m. just because Jump Start is quite exhausting, and my eyelids are slowly closing at this very moment. I had this strange thought though and I wanted to write it out....

You see two days ago I was driving home in the dead of night. It was about 1:30a.m. and I had been watching the Olympics and drifting in and out of consciousness the majority of the night, so needless to say I was out of it. ---Some background information--There's a stage I tend to go to when I'm sleepy when random things/thoughts jump out and take control over my mind. This is also the stage I like to write my papers in because I tend to be tired enough to get my work done and mellow enough to not stress but rather write.---Anyways, back to what I was saying--As I was driving down Avon Rd. someone else appeared over the hill and quickly flicked their brights off; however, the damage had been done...I was blinded. Note, I could still see the road and was in no real danger of hurting anyone, well at least no more than usual, but everything was blurred.

This is where I'm going to make a leap...I began to compare this to life in general. How often is my vision blurred by bright lights such as work, homework, gossip, greed, selfishness, friends, family, emotions, etc.? Sometimes these things will creep up on us, just like a car appearing as it drives over a hill, flashing lights in our eyes. This is when we need sunglasses on I guess and, finishing this crazy metaphor, mine are prayer, my Bible, Jesus, and all things to keep my mind focused on my spirituality rather than anything else...I said I was going to be making a stretch haha

...that is all. :)

jump start is here...

I can't believe it's August 12th and Jump Start stuff kicks off in 10 hours! It seems so long ago that I was filling out my application to be a leader, and Terrill suggested I apply for the co-director position instead. After my interview and recieving my letter offering me the job then all the meetings over the past 6 months accumulating to this day...well I can't believe it's finally here! I love that in the next few hours all the leaders will be moving back on campus and tonight I'll get to see everyone. I hope they're all as pumped as I am for the next week. Hopefully everything will go smoothly, there won't be too many headaches, and no one hires a hitman on anyone else...haha

Soooo....Here's to the freshman and transfer students movng on-campus in 4 days, may your time at RC be amazing in every aspect possible...that is all. :)

tim mcgraw

I've been a fan of Tim McGraw since I was about 15 years old. He's the first country singer to catch my attention, and his greatest hits c.d. is one of my favorites of all time.

In Jr. High and early High School I hated country music. My dad has always been a fan but his love for country music was definitely not genetic. Whenever he would turn it on my brother and I would make him turn it off just as quickly. However, I can still remember the Saturday night in early spring of my freshman year of high school when my brother came home from Target with Tim McGraw's greatest hits. My parents and I teased him a bit for purchasing the country music, but when he wanted to play it on our way to church the next day my dad did not hesitate to put it on, and the end result was shocking. For the first time in my life I enjoyed listening to country music.

I will admit though it wasn't for another 3 or 4 years down the road when my love for this genre of music would expand to what it is today. My freshman year of college Lindsay and I became pretty tight. At that point in time she didn't have a car or driver’s license so often I'd be the one driving us around. It didn't matter what we were doing, where we'd be going, or how many times we'd overplayed it Tim McGraw would be the c.d. of choice. Between songs like "Something like that" (which we have a dance to...), "Just to see you smile", "Don't take the girl" etc. we couldn't help but rock out and be entertained for hours.

Other songs played huge roles in my life over the years, such as "My Best Friend", which still brings tears to my eyes when I think of all the memories behind it. They're of course happy tears in case anyone was keeping track... :)

So, this is my love letter to Tim McGraw, I guess I'm kind of following Taylor Swift's example since she wrote a song about it. I will always love Tim McGraw for introducing me to country music and helping me to form the love I have for it today..that is all. :)

august

I can't believe it's already August. There is just so much to do in the next couple of weeks. First, it's my last week at the store. I love my job, and I'm so sad to quit. :( The people I work with have become so important in my life...duh. I spend 50+ hours a week at my store, of course I'm going to get close to the people I work with every day. I used to have some harsh judgments about Abercrombie and Fitch, though I never hated the store like so many people I know. However, the people there are amazing! They aren't snobby or arrogant (well at least most of them aren't) but instead they are kind, caring, funny, and pretty darn awesome.

Jump Start is only a week away!!! I can't wait for all the leaders to move back next week and then all the freshman to arrive on the 14th. Looking back 4 years ago to when I was moving on campus to play volleyball makes me smile. I can't wait to be one of the first people to welcome them to Rochester College. The next few years of their lives will be some of the most memorable and important and I have the blessing of playing a major role in that. Hopefully I don't mess it up too badly. :)

After JS I'm planning to go to Nashville for 4 or 5 days. I want to spend some time with my big brother and uncle especially. It's still sooooooo weird that my brother lives there officially now. I'm so excited for him. When I visit its like a preview of what my life is going to be in a few months after graduation. If I only knew where I'll be moving after December 13th. God will provide this I know. :)

Then lastly I will start student teaching! How amazing is it that I'll have my own class for a whole semester. I'll get the chance to know my students' names, strengths, weaknesses, quirks, etc. Spending every day in the classroom will be challenging, but I'm ready to step up my game. I just pray that I will be effective as a teacher and taken seriously. Looking so young has always made my placements interesting....I'm going to have juniors mainly in the fall so 5 years will separate me from my students. I've learned so much in the past five years of my life. I'm going to do my best to share the knowledge I have with my students. Maybe my youth will be an advantage in being able to relate to my students.

So...August here I come! ..that is all. :)

book club

I want to read. The idea of sitting down with a few books and doing nothing but being literate for a while sounds so enticing to me. The library has always been a favorite place of mine. There is something so amazing about the smell of books. It might sounds strange but when you crack open a novel at first there is a richness in the aroma.

I remember in elementary school when there was a reading program. Once you completed so many books you would win a free pizza from pizza hut. I wish I could still get free food just for reading. haha Maybe that's the poor, hungry college student in me talking. Perhaps there should be some profound thought to this, but I just wish I had more free time to read...enough said.

Someone actually told me the other day they didn't want to read the book because if the plot was any good someone would just make a movie for it sooner or later. The sad part...they were dead serious. When I have kids I'm going to make them read books before they watch the movie. I bet they'll resent me for that. haha ..that is all. :)

embrace the moments

I find myself being so impatient these days. There are just so many things I desire, and I can't reach out and grab them. They are the types of things you just must be patient and wait on. I consider myself so blessed, but I want more. I guess it's human nature; however, I find that in my case I might take this to an extreme. It seems to be a trend in my life to want to hit the skip button. There are times I think, "Just one more hour, one more day, one more week, or just a few more months and then...." (finishing that sentence varies all the time). I so often forget about the here and now. Wow, living in the present?!? What a crazy concept.

There are so many important things going on in my life, even in this moment. Sure, I'm just sitting on my couch letting my fingers glide across my keyboard, but how awesome is it that I have time to sit and write? It's something I love to do and here I am "living the dream" and doing it. I sound like a hallmark card or some corny after school special...but I'm over it. I'm corny and not ashamed. My goal for the next month is to stop myself from wanting to hit the fast forward and instead maybe try to put things in slow motion instead. (I'm loving this whole remote control analogy tonight I guess.) I might also take use of the pause button and truly savor moments. In a short time I will be so busy with work and student teaching I might not have much time to be corny and write on here. I'd really miss this too if that does happen.

Here's to those moments worth savoring, may there be more of them in the near future...that is all.

the mole

I have a confession to make: I love watching The Mole on t.v. (actually I watch it online because I usually work Monday nights when it airs, but you get the idea). In a nutshell there are 12 players: 6 women, 6 men, with ages ranging from 20 to 60 years old, all of different occupations, etc. you get the idea. They have traveled to Mexico in order to compete in missions each episode; however, one of the team members is being paid to sabotage the missions. At the end of every show the players must take the quiz, which consists of 10 questions about the mole's every move and the player with the most incorrect answers gets sent home.

As I watch the show I also make my own assumptions as to who the mole is. I find myself running into trouble though because when I watch the shows I see EVERYTHING. This includes confessions and behind the scene footage, which only the viewers at home have the "advantage" of watching. Now, I say all this to make a point. I watch the show alone, but always discuss with LeAnn my "big sister" :) We used to watching it back when I was in high school too and analyze everything, making our own assumptions as to who might be the mole. As I told LeAnn though I hate having to see/hear everything. There are too many voices influencing me. I wish I could just observe everything without having to be mislead.

As I was telling this to LeAnn it struck me this is similar to life itself. There are so many voices bussing around. Which ones do we listen to? There is a quote, and sorry I can't recall who said it, that goes, "One of the hardest things in life is knowing which bridge to keep and which bridge to burn." Who are the true friends in our lives that we can trust? Who should be listen to and allow to influence ourselves? This is a challenge I find myself struggling with...all we can do is hope and pray that the people who love, respect, and trust will do their best to not let us down...that is all.